Sunday, June 07, 2009

One of our cats has a broken leg. Could have been a hit and run.  Could have been a fox bite apparently. Yesterday, instead of being at home preparing for the arrival of the 30 odd people for our annual garden party, I was ensconced at CitiVet on the Mile End Road.  A callow youth with allergies masquerading as a vet X-rayed Tip Little and announced that he would put a “cast” on the offending leg as an interim measure until a proper surgeon was able to operate and relieve me of a £grand or so.  Money I would prefer to spend on a holiday, naturally.

 

The sneezy snuffly lad took Tip into a back room, after asking the receptionist/assistant to abandon reception and assist him.  She checked that the door was latched and left me alone with my anxieties.  I paced up and down the white room, dramatically.  I read the pinnings on the noticeboard.  I watched the parade of nations walking down the street.  I studied the rain pouring from slate clouds until the promised “sunny intervals” emerged, as the start time for the party drew closer and closer.  I saw cars and buses and bicycles.  I followed the numbers on the digital clock and wished I were somewhere else. 

 

A bloke in his mid fifties was suddenly rattling the front door and I let him in without thinking.  His eyes were red and wet and he was holding a Tuxedo cat wrapped in a black bin liner.  The cat miaowed once or twice, feebly, heavy in his arms.  The man started to speak and I quickly, jaggedly, explained that I was a just another customer and that the receptionist was out back and would surely return soon.

 

He was extremely agitated so I eventually asked if he was alright, asked if the cat had been in accident?  “I am the one who is in distress!” he said, strong East End. “My wife died yesterday and I can’t look after the cat.  I just can’t.  They ‘ave to put it down or whatever they do.  Or I let it run wild on the street and my wife won’t want that.  Would not have wanted that.  I can’t look after a cat.”  The man was pretty much sobbing now and looked like he was just ready to put down the burden and bolt. I tried to say some stuff that wasn’t all wrong but nothing sank in.  He just rustled the bin liner wrapped around the quiet, resigned, slightly embarrassed black and white cat.

 

The man and I stared at each for a long time both wishing the receptionist would come back from attending to Tip to sort this all out.  He opened his mouth to speak and held the cat out in front of him.  We stood there frozen, speechless, crushed by the moment, utterly lost. 

 

A car horn beeped outside.  Again and then again.  I looked through the window to see a younger guy at the wheel of dark green hatchback, accompanied by a baby in a car seat. The driver leant out of the window, waving a cigarette at us and yelled “JANE’S GONNA TAKE CARE OF THE CAT!”

 

So the cat in the black bin liner left with the crying man who got into the car with a chap that knows someone called Jane who’s going to look after it.  I stood by the door blinking for a few minutes until I noticed, peripherally, a big black cat skulking and hopping across the floor.  Tip had escaped the clutches feckless vet and was limping his way to freedom.  


The so-called cast turned out to be a ridiculous courgette shaped bandage which was later to be found, ownerless and fur-encrusted, in TrouserTown – Tip’s favourite of all Matt’s clothing shelves.  


Our cat, whilst feeling slightly sorry for himself, is largely undefeated.  Tomorrow we’ll hear what needs to happen next to fix him.

 

The party went OK but I never quite managed to shake off the whole giant weight of that man’s incomparable loss and confusion bundled up in a black plastic bag.

 

Thursday, December 11, 2008

7.30am

The sheep and goat pens on Buxton Street are empty early doors, save for the magpies and sparrows bouncing on the woodchip. I can hear a big dog’s echoey bark somewhere towards Hoxton. A little grey felty purebreed in a tartan jacket is being walked into Allen Gardens, twitching, its owner wearing woolly earflaps. Pigeons peck at the middle of Brick Lane, darting, chancers, almost pretty and poetic in front of the headlights of a white van in the thin dawn. The Dray Walk cleaners shelter in the kebab shack, smoking.

They are digging up the roads and the pavements. They are unloading boxes of bottles next to the wine bar. They are making San Pellegrino and olive oil deliveries to Pizza Express. They are diverting traffic. They are stopping pedestrians and cyclists to let heavy trucks come and go, flopping pale wet dirt wads onto the walkways, creamed under 40,000 shoes.

There’s an overturned cup and a puddle of Latte at the corner of Bishopsgate and London Wall. Seems to be a spill there almost every morning. Scuttles of people in big coats and striped suits and hats and gloves and scarves with briefcases, suitcases, newspapers, books, coffee, cigarettes. With rushing about their daily business. With mobile phones. With distractions and intimate calls in the middle of crowds of strangers.

I will definitely overtake people on the bridge when I spot a gap in the oncoming heave of commuters. I plan to speed up and nip out, keeping my head down – no eye contact - and my long coat away from the burning fag ends. I will sidestep the Big Issue seller’s steaming cup of tea and the diabolos at the motley feet of the juggler as he fills his flame batons with white spirit. I will absolutely bolt to the finish line of my office steps when I get into the final straight of Borough High Street, with the survival instincts of an upstreaming salmon.

But when I am only halfway there and the bloke behind me at the crossing pushes me forward, before the lights have even changed, I push back and scowl because I want to head in slowly today. Today I want to let it all go on around me. Today when it isn’t even properly light yet.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Sunday, November 16, 2008

My husband is marvellous

Me:  "Did you manage to get to the post office to pick up that package?"
Him:  "Yeah, I went to the post office but it said on the box 'beauty products' and you don't need no damn beauty products."
Me: "Awww, you are so sweet!"
Him: "So I left it there."

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Friday, November 24, 2006

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Dystopia















The new science fiction film Children of Men is set in a disturbing, apocalyptic Britain of the future. So which grim location would a group of terrorist kidnappers chose to shove the hooded hero Clive Owen out of a van?

Round the corner from my workplace, of course.

(the junction of Leman St and Dock St, London E1)

It really is time that I got a new job.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Monday, September 04, 2006

Saturday, September 02, 2006

Thursday, August 31, 2006

Two nephews, one niece

We sailed the kids up through the drab bleached cut-price neon wholesale-only sweatshop fashion highway into a deserted shopping arcade, wandering past the beautiful brown Shadwell people in swathes of pink and orange and turquoise and black, with ninja eye slits and mobile phones and big trainers. We bounced above the glinting docks on a red and blue train with no driver, spotting yachts and swans and a giant inflatable octopus and bubbles in the afternoon light over a floating rectangle of sand. We showed them the massive masted last surviving tea clipper in the whole wide world, soundtracked by a bandannered busker playing a didgeridoo. They walked along a tunnel under the Thames and back. We stood at the argent shining base of Canary Wharf and snapped our necks back to try to make size sense of the multistacked floors and vast repeating patterns of windows. The sun baked and brightened east London and we ate spiced chicken and walked home through the park to wrap up in blankets in the garden and make shadow puppets from the street light.

Their lasting memory of the day is of a dead dog washed up with the plastic water bottles on a beach out at Greenwich. The rotting black and fly-punctured furless streamlined cantering carcass of an indefinable breed, pulsating with stink and murky wet whispers of a vile unnatural death.

“Not something you see everyday!” said Jack, aged 9.

He told his Mum about it and also, later, confessed to having accidentally used “the f word” on her answerphone. So I am wondering if they’ll be allowed to come again? I let them have jelly (American jello) for breakfast. What can I say? It was a one time offer. I figured they are only reckless little kids for a tiny while.

Monday, May 22, 2006

Sunday, May 21, 2006

Saturday, May 20, 2006

Friday, May 19, 2006

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Sunday, May 14, 2006